A stampede of clumsy beans bowling each other over toward a crown.

The gut choice here rests on a single duel, so we set it aside, far too little to conclude. On to the detail, criterion by criterion. Fun comes out on top, ahead of more than 60% of games, and it makes sense: Fall Guys is instant laughter, the hilarious tumble. Desert island stays around average, controller feel too. But then everything caves in. Attachment is at the very bottom, art direction struggles, and rediscovery sinks straight to the floor of the rankings. Sound seems decent but on just two votes, so to confirm. The tension is plain: you have a blast in the moment, but nothing really sticks.

Compared to other online party games, this is a game of the now, made for the evening session, not for the memory you cherish. The fun is real, but it evaporates.

So who's it for? You, if you want the release valve with friends, the quick round that makes everyone howl. Much less if you want a game that leaves a lasting mark, or one you'd dream of reliving untouched.